‘What Could You Possibly Be?’ — Doctor Who: The Pandorica Opens

Previous episode: The Lodger.

Oh. My. God. Guess who?
This was magnificent. The twists, the turns, the tragedy. Everything. Steven Moffat, I bloody love you. At the same time: Curse you, Moffat! One, for nearly giving me a heart attack, two, for making me sob into my dinner, and three, for the most awesome cliffhanger I’ve seen in.. well, ever. Rory’s back! He’s back because he’s a part of Amy’s history, and because of that dress-uppy photo in Amy’s Roman Britain he’s linked to the cover story—and he’s an Auton, supplied by the Nestene Consciousness. And he shoots Amy. Great. And the director, Toby Haynes, has called this “the death of the Doctor as we know him.” Lovely.

The Doctor: “The Pandorica…”—River: “More than just a fairy tale.”

“Squeaky Bum Time!” — Time Can Be Rewritten. Doctor Who: Cold Blood (2).

Rory!

Previous episode: The Hungry Earth.

Dear, dear Chris. I’ll be honest with you. It wasn’t completely boring, it didn’t have me look at the clock thinking ‘Oh, how long is this gonna take to get over with itself’, and the question of how they were going to manoeuvre themselves out of the dead sister thing did have me genuinely worried. Needless to say, I cried and cussed when Rory, poor Rory, caught the figurative bullet meant for the Doctor, died in Amy’s arms and, just to top that off, got removed from time and history by the Time Field behind the crack; effectively wiped from everyone’s except the Doctor’s memory. Oh, bloody wonderful. As I said, it wasn’t completely horrible, but this two-parter was the weakest of this new series, when it comes to wonky writing and not-so-sparkly-as-we’ve-enjoyed-before dialogue.

I’ll just get the plot and the writing and acting over with before I come to what’s this episode actually telling and, in some ways, teaching us.

“Oi! Don’t Diss the Sonic!” — So Much for Drilling You a New One. Doctor Who: The Hungry Earth (1).

Previous episode: Amy’s Choice.

Nom nom nom.

Soo, after I’ve been dutifully crying into my breakfast yesterday morning over the finale of Ashes to Ashes, now on to something a bit more cheerful — if equally chilling. “Onward and Downwards” is the motto of this two-parter; or at least it would be, if Downstairs hadn’t decided to change the beat a little. They’re coming Upwards, and they’re all set to incinerate the human race.